A few months ago I wrote an article “Hormones and Happiness” that was about hormones and how they work differently for men and women. Besides that, I also wrote how this directly connects to femininity, and what actions promote or decrease a certain hormone. I invite you to look at it briefly if you have not already because today I am going into details about one specific hormone – oxytocin.
This hormone is released in us when we do certain things. In the context of femininity, this is the hormone we, women, need to pay attention to when we want to be happy. Not “if”. “When”. So, this explains the saying that if you want happiness, you need to create it yourself. If you want oxytocin, you need to do some things in order to release it more. And what are those things? Read on to find out.
What is Oxytocin?
Before we talk about specific ways to increase it, let me share first what this hormone is responsible for and why do we need it so that you can be more convinced about doing those things.
Oxytocin is a hormone of sense of safety and protection in a group of other people. It motivates to manifest trust to others and to provide a personal feeling of safety in a group. It is being released during touching, the sense of support from others, giving birth to a baby, holding a baby, having friendships, hugging. All of these things take a woman’s stress away.
In a nutshell, oxytocin is a true elixir of a woman’s well-being and femininity. By learning how to activate it and how to regulate and release more of it you will simply break your personal code to femininity. Once you reach the level of fullness energetically that comes with a high level of oxytocin, it is something that cannot be really described with words. Once you experience it, you won’t want to go back.
What Does Oxytocin Give Us?
It is probably easier to say what doesn’t it give. Here are some things you will get once your oxytocin is high:
Sparkly eyes
Interest to life
Glowing skin
Energy
Tenderness in behavior
A fresh look at things
Positivity
Readiness to forgive
Relaxed softened face
Relaxed body
Satisfaction with life
Straight back
Power
And here is an amazing statement. Oxytocin is truly a gift from heaven to us women because if we don’t interfere with a man’s world, we will feel this way ALL THE TIME. And all of the industries of medicine and beauty will go bankrupt because women wouldn’t need them. The reality is it doesn’t work this way and women are involved in many “manly” things. Mother Nature did not expect women to work all the time and be under stress all the time which releases a great amount of testosterone which is detrimental to a woman’s body. So, according to Nature, women should have a different lifestyle where our oxytocin is being released regularly and generously, keeping us all youthful-looking, beautiful and healthy.
Oxytocin is truly a gift from heaven to us women because if we don’t interfere with a man’s world, we will feel this way all the time.
We are here now to learn how to still release oxytocin even with this modern pace of life.
Oxytocin Woman
You may have met a woman like this. All the men want to be around her all the time, and she is not necessarily beautiful. All of the men want to make her every wish come true. Perhaps you remember a woman who was laughing a lot, and she would be surrounded by suitors ready to her every whim. Such women have some sort of special aura of trust and grace. They are confident about themselves, they are relaxed and very soft, they smile a lot. Such women respect themselves and show men around them that they deserve to be treated accordingly.
A woman who is so confident and so calm will inevitably translate an intention into the outside world that everyone wants to take care of her and she can always count on someone’s help and support. This subconscious idea is manifested and people around her catch it and follow it. This is the magic of oxytocin.
Lack of Oxytocin
Unfortunately, our modern life makes it so women do not have a chance to grow their oxytocin all of the time. This brings them to chronic fatigue, health issues, dull skin, depression, loneliness, and overall unhappiness with life. By trying to rush and follow our desires, we deplete ourselves more and more.
The lack of oxytocin creates the lack of energy that so many women crave now. And regardless if a woman is alone or with a partner, the lack of this hormone makes her use her last energy to fight with life which makes her feel completely drained. That makes her unable to take care of herself or her family and give them joy, love, and care.
When we don’t have enough of oxytocin, our complex bodily system gets affected which shows in our behavior, sense of well-being, our relationships with the world around us.
And when our amazing intuitive female body works great inside and outside, this helps us feel full of energy and well-being. This is a very important part of harnessing the power of femininity. Once our level of the hormone oxytocin is high, we are able to feel an incredible amount of energy, joy, happiness, tenderness, and attractiveness to our beloved.
When you learn how to do all of the things that increase oxytocin (idea for a new “To Do” list right here), your feeling of sadness, depression, weakness, lack of interest in life, even PMS will go away completely.
So, it is time to learn about 29 ways that increase your oxytocin. The order here does not matter at all, it is not from more important to less important at all. So please, don’t pay attention to numbers. And also, don’t try to do them all, this is the masculine in you. Just do them whenever you feel like doing them. Maybe some of them you like less, some more. So pick what you like and enjoy.
Ways To Increase Oxytocin
Here we go.
Massage.
Massage gives us the feeling of touch, so bingo. It relaxes us and inspires us. The important thing here is to make sure you like your masseuse. This will generate a feeling of trust which will help you to relax. Also, for women, there should not be anything sexual, unless it is a massage from your partner. So keep that in mind. Foot massage also counts.
Body care.
This includes pedicure, manicure, haircut, facials, body treatment. The important part here is when someone else does it to you, not yourself. This creates the feeling of care which releases oxytocin. So again, you should trust your master.
Girls get-together.
An important note here – it has to be a real girls-only innocent event. No partying, drinking, getting wasted or spending the night doing crazy things. This is about doing some girly things that generate a sense of comfort, protection, and peace. That could be – cooking together, arts and crafts, making a group phone call, creating handmade skincare products, baking, making jewelry, flower bouquets, having a beautiful dinner at a beautiful place, drinking tea with sweets. You get the idea.
Yoga, meditation, and pranayama.
If you practice any of these things, all of them are wonderful in promoting oxytocin. When you do any of them, it naturally promotes the feeling of relaxation, and of course, you cannot really do them in some busy environment. So naturally, when you do yoga or meditate, you will generally find yourself in some nice and quiet space, which helps with oxytocin even more.
Listening to music.
That does not mean the music on a background that plays like white noise and you don’t really listen. It means actually enjoying the music that plays. Pick your music carefully and mindfully. Create beautiful playlists for any of your moods and all of the songs that you truly enjoy. Good music will make you simply sit down, put your big headphones on and sit back in a nice comfortable chair. That’s it. That is how you listen to your favorite music.
Singing.
Any sort of singing – in the shower or karaoke. Shower singing is actually especially very good because you are usually by yourself which relaxes you more, and water helps you sound much better. Plus water is an additional piece of relaxation. Choir singing is extremely powerful, and lessons of singing are even better. By taking lessons of singing, or of anything really, it naturally releases oxytocin because someone else takes care of you, and you are being helped. It feels really good.
Baths.
Taking a bath is pure magic. You can level it up indefinitely by adding things to water, on water, on the bathtub, in your bathroom, on your face, body, and hair. It is the care of all senses, so oxytocin will be through the roof. Be careful with taking a bath with regular rose petals because they are usually being sprayed with pesticides. So either use your own homegrown roses from the garden, or use rose hips from tea.
Spa rituals.
Anything Spa equals oxytocin. It includes touch, relaxation, the feeling of care, and the feeling of protection. All of the things that help raise the oxytocin levels easily and naturally.
Walking.
Various walking or hiking with friends, touring with a group of friends, but pleasant and easy. Don’t go hiking on a long arduous trails where you need to remember your skills of survival. Not that. This should be easy, enjoyable, and giving you energy, not taking it away.
Gardening.
This is an incredible way to increase oxytocin and get yourself grounded at the same time. However, please do not plant a whole garden that will require you to spend hours and hours in it. Only a few tomatoes or berries, the rest mostly flowers. Get yourself a pretty hat, pretty gloves, pretty shoes, and pretty gardening tools. This is what we are after, not a sweaty heavy physical activity that makes you sore at the end every time. This will not promote oxytocin.
Cooking together.
Spending time in the kitchen together with your female family members or friends. This should be something easy, enjoyable, and fun. As long as the owner of the kitchen is okay with you helping her, that will be perfect.
Shopping.
The same thing with shopping, it is a great time to spend with friends and have some fun. So it is a fun relaxing experience, not routine or hardcore money spending. Trying out outfits and not necessarily buying them also releases oxytocin. Also, shopping for some food at Farmer’s Market. This is not a heavy-duty weekly shopping at the store, but a lovely time spent outside in the fresh air where you can slowly touch and pick fresh vegetables, fruits, flowers, other things. Touching them and smelling them, admiring their colors incredibly helps with oxytocin.
Holding a baby.
Either your own or someone else’s baby will be fine. Please note, it has to be a small and cute baby, not an old and heavy one. This will not release oxytocin if you are struggling. As an option, the same thing can be done with a pet, but again – small and manageable.
Asking for help.
You can do that when for instance you are driving. You can stop and ask someone how to get there. This will help with oxytocin because someone is helping you and takes care of you. Or with anything else – when your car is broken, when you need to carry something (not even necessarily very heavy), when you need to get something from a higher shelf. All of these so-call old-fashioned things existed for a reason. It is about care, and care is about love and hormones of happiness.
Books.
Collecting books for the library or reading books is amazing. If you love books and book shops, this will help tremendously. Just by going to a book shop and going through books, reading them a little bit here and there is sort of a mystical experience. It magically helps with oxytocin every time. Owning books and arranging them by color and size, if you want, also does the same thing.
Cooking recipes and classes.
Collecting recipes and having a family recipe book does wonder. Alternatively, if you want to share your culinary jewels and skills, you can have a cooking blog. Sharing recipes that will make other people happy and provide you with compliments will obviously help oxytocin to go high. The same with cooking classes, not only it is fun and a great idea to meet with your girlfriends, but also a way to learn something new and promote oxytocin.
Get a gardener.
If you can afford it, getting a gardener will help you create magic in your garden with someone else’s hands. This, surprisingly, releases oxytocin. And of course, it also makes your garden looks fabulous, clean, and taken care of.
Hobbies and masterclasses.
Having a hobby or a club where you attend to do the same thing you love with other people is also helping with oxytocin.
Planning vacation or event.
If you are into planning, this will be great for you. However, the important part here is you are not responsible for this. Because if something goes wrong and won’t work, and you are responsible, this won’t release oxytocin. This will create more stress.
Feeding the homeless, animals, birds.
Feeding anyone really releases oxytocin in every woman. I adore cooking for my man and then looking at how he eats and enjoys it. Pure oxytocin. You can join a group of volunteers who cook for homeless people and then distribute food, or you can just go out in nature and safely feed animals and birds. You can even do it in your backyard if you have one.
Beach.
This is is pretty self-explanatory. But if you need to understand: sea or ocean is a calming water element full of vital minerals and salt (so also cleansing), the sun helps with Vitamin D (please avoid being under the direct sun between 11 am and 4 pm), and warm soothing sand is just nice to touch and feel on your skin. Swimming is amazing additionally. This is my all-time favorite, always has, and always will be.
Watching a movie together.
Watching something together, with family or friends, really helps with oxytocin. It creates a sense of safety, coziness, and calm. Please avoid watching something violent or stressful for the purposes of releasing oxytocin, obviously.
Sports.
Please, don’t do it until you die. This is NOT what we want. Any sort of sport is okay as long as you are enjoying it and doing it a little bit. You get the idea.
Learning new traditions and cultures.
You can do it either online or by traveling, which takes it to the next level. A cooking tours or language tours is amazing examples. And again, when you do these kinds of trips to learn something about a new culture, this should be relaxing where you don’t come back totally exhausted but happy. You need to be back totally relaxed and happy. Also, don’t go to risky and potentially dangerous places, too.
Getting rid of old things.
Cleaning your space out of old and unwanted things also helps a lot with our hormones. This creates a sense of space not only in your house but also in your soul. And while you are doing it, you can enjoy it and mentally imagine how you clean out space for the new things in life.
Journaling.
If you like writing and have great handwriting or writing skills, this is a wonderful thing to do. Please note, this is not about depressive journaling about how life is awful and everything lost sense. This is about going through your internal world and organizing your thoughts and ideas.
Moving things at the house.
You probably know this but when you move furniture or décor even just a little bit, it freshens things up and promotes serotonin. It also refreshes the energy at the house that can get stagnant.
Health improvement programs.
Doing anything for your body that promotes health and makes you feel better later will naturally release oxytocin. It can be anything you want to do but again, it has to be safe, enjoyable, and affordable.
There are plenty of other little things that help you feel this way, I am sure. If you can think of something that I did not mention already, please comment so that other women can get ideas and see how the same things make them, us, all happy.
I loved this one! Super helpful list- it makes sense to me intuitively that these would raise oxytocin. I’m looking forward to trying them all out. Thank you for writing this blog, Ksenia. Take care xoxo
This was a fantastic read, I will definitely be taking part in these activities to improve my health. Oxytocin has many healing powers ❤️🩹
I am so glad you resonated with it. Feel free to share later how you feel once you try them 🙂 ♡
Hi dear. I love reading your articles and always waiting for the notification. I would be grateful if you could make an article on the topic of the heart. How can I stay open and light up my heart again after being frustrated by men? What should I do? I have always feel that I need to close my heart but I heard that it is not good for a feminine woman.. Thank you❤️
Hi Riza! That is a wonderful topic to discuss. Yes, having an open heart is an important but hard task. I will definitely write about it. Much love to you!