Accepting yourself as a woman can be difficult for most modern women. It is nearly impossible to embrace femininity without the realization of your own feminine nature. The modern world requires women to be equal with men not on a basic human rights level, but also professionally. And it can be hard.
It can be hard for women because the main mission of a woman’s life is motherhood and care of loved ones, and it is being lost now. The whole being of a woman is built to do these things perfectly and often even effortlessly. It is in our DNA, however, we are all shaped differently due to upbringing, families we grew up, what we were taught in schools and what people surrounded us.
Many women who found success in careers start thinking about why they have this feeling of unhappiness, lack of satisfaction, even though they are successful. For most, if not all, modern successful women to accept their femininity is equal to accepting their weakness. However, no matter how hard we try to suppress our feminine essence, we still remain women: emotional, sensitive, and caring.
Before we talk about a few simple steps we can take to embrace our feminine side, what could be the real reasons we are having such a hard time doing it?
Possible Reasons for Blocked Femininity
+ Conflicts and fights in the family where a girl grew up.
+ During the process of upbringing a girl decides it is easier to be a boy because maybe her brother received more love, or her mother and women around her were single and were always complaining about how hard it was to be a woman.
+ Focusing more on developing logic and linear thinking in classes at school without paying enough attention to the creative side of things. Participation in various contests and competitions, aiming to reach certain goals and have an external success – all of these are very masculine activities.
+ Disharmonious sexual life, sexual traumas especially at the beginning.
+ Incorrect attitude towards normal and natural female physiological processes, like menstruation, pregnancy, breastfeeding, and as a result fear of it and a desire to escape it.
+ Abortions.
+ “Masculine” type of job and career or business.
+ Negative attitude towards men that has started due to disrespect, fear, violence, or suppression.
+ Non-realization of your creative potential.
+ The lack of self-love. This is the most important piece that originates from the lack of tenderness and love in childhood.
As you can imagine, most of us have one or a few things from this list. And unfortunately, it is a normal part of life. What is important is that we are now starting to learn about femininity more and more. It is up to us to step into this deeper and see how different our lives can be when we embrace this part of ourselves.
A woman who is unhappy as a woman, the one who does all of the things herself, is in constant internal tension. This is why gynecological diseases happen, early climaxes start, depression and apathy grow. And we should not just let it happen. We need to heal our inner girl, inner woman, so that she stops being sad and scared, but learn you accept her beautiful self instead.
Once your happiness happens inside of you, internally, on the level of sensations, this is when the outside expression of this love appears – in the form of the passionate hobby, self-realization, or a man of your dreams.
Steps To Embrace Femininity
So how do we accept and embrace our femininity?
1. Stop being scared of your own feelings and emotions. You are a WOMAN. Let yourself express and say everything that you feel. If it is not possible at work, understandably, do it as often as possible at home. Remember that you are either a girlfriend, a wife, or a mother, so speaking in a controlling tone probably won’t be perceived as good. Men really want to go away when this happens because they feel the man in you. And they want a woman, not another man.
2. Let others help you. Seriously. You don’t have to be strong and independent everywhere. Let your husband make decisions, and your son do the laundry. If you think you are a strong person, it does not necessarily mean you have to do everything yourself. The power of a woman is in her flexibility and even fragility. And it is also in learning how to perceive the outside world with love.
3. Try to truly take care of others. Even if you don’t have a family of your own, you can take care of your parents, siblings, or other relatives. When you build relationships with your coworkers, be a woman sometimes – soft with a charming smile. Don’t be afraid that someone will think you are weak and unable to make your own decisions.
A woman’s fragility is an important element in a psychological organization of a woman. If we suppress it, we do not become strong. We only continue to try to be like men, competing with them which eventually destroys us and won’t help us to embrace femininity.
It is never too late to start changing 😉
I am so blessed to be a part of the universe that gets to read your blog. You are amazing and thank you for creating this space. I have to say I had no idea that conflict blocked feminine energies from properly flowing. I had also decided to not have children and I realize now that this was made from a place of fear and damage. I also come from a community where men have the upper hand in inheritance etc so the drive to succeed and buy my own assets as a means of survival was so embedded in me. Thanks to this post, I now look at life from a new perspective. I can be a successful mother, a successful entrepreneur driven by feminine energy. I don’t have to struggle to prove that I am capable as a man. All I have to do, is flow in the gift given me in this incarnation. Not being a victim of a man’s world. I am successful in my feminine world. I flow in it.
Hello Beatrice. I have to say, this comment absolutely made my day but also what you said is exactly what I am trying to convey throughout my entire blog! This is the message, and you absolutely got it! Thank you from the bottom of my heart <3
Great perspective Beatrice, using the word struggle to prove you are as capable as a man is poignant, as was the sublime woman’s comment about tone of control being masculine. Seeing what patriarchal habits in us look like helps in undoing and transmutation of them. Thank you ladies, Andrea
<3 <3 <3 Thank YOU!
Beautiful article, Ksenia….
Thank you! 🙂 <3
this is retarded i aint even like kids, im not a incubator, im not here only to be a mother.
You are not <3
such a great blog! thank you for this! just yesterday found it 🙂
Hi! You are so welcome, I’m glad you like it 🙂
Thank you so much for his blog.
On behalf of so many of us who did not even know we were masculine and repelling men, THANK YOU!
It feels like I am taking a feminine online course.
How do we genuinely change our tone of voice to be more feminine and how do we become less action-oriented? Do you have articles on that, please?
Bless you
Thank YOU for reading it and leaving such comments <3 <3 <3 It truly made my day! This is an excellent idea for my next post! So check back on later, I will write about it 🙂 Xoxo
I have only been here a few times. Every article is so rich and beautiful. I am past my youthful years and am a grandmother 17 times. As I said I am not very familiar with all the lovely articles yet however I haven’t seen space and practices for the older female, the menopausal women. Is there something I am missing? Also I love the art work and all the beautiful photos of women but I have never seen a real women, mother floating around in silky sheet of see through fabrics, is this really what you think being feline is?
Hello Marcile! Thank you for stopping by and leaving a comment. I am glad you enjoy my blog. Most articles are for younger women as my main goal is to for them to have this knowledge as younger as possible to have a more fulfilling life as a woman in future. And also, I myself is in my 30s so I feel like I can write about what I have experienced and lived myself. Once I am older, my content will get older too 🙂 Photos used on my website are for pleasing aesthetics only, I do not have an intention to keep things realistic.